As much as I don't want it to be, I think we've finally come to an end. We have not really spoken to one another for about a week now. He hasn't called me nor have I really called him. At first, I just wanted to give him his space. There's been some things going on in his life and I know that he just wants to deal with them on his own. So, I backed off. And then kept backing off. (I'm talking about the past couple weeks now, not just this past week.) Part of me was making a point: How when I don't do all the calling or texting, he also doesn't take the time to talk to me.
I'm burnt out. I never knew it was possible to become burnt out within a relationship. I always thought it was a term that dealt with jobs or school.. not relationships. But I'm tired. I've been tired for a good month and a half now but I've just held on. We haven't been together TOO terribly long so I don't feel like I'm throwing away a huge portion of my life by not being with him anymore. But, it's still hard because I do really care a lot about him.
When I met him, I fell hard. And I fell fast. It was the start of second semester 2008 and we had the same history class together. I had never seen him before and when I did, I thought he was one of the best looking guys I had ever seen and I was going to pursue this no matter what it took. Unfortunately, it took a month before I finally had the guts to do something about it. We went out over spring break and things just went from there. He was still in school so our schedules matched up pretty well and we'd see each other a few nights during the week (and also in class). After he graduated and started working full-time, it was harder to see each other because I was also working a full-time job as well as a part-time job on the weekends. But, we made it work by seeing each other on Fridays and sometimes on Sundays. Then, school started again for me and it became even harder to spend time together. It was like this up until this past November when I was being bombarded with tests, presentations & papers for my classes as well as having to work about 20 hours a week. We would go days without talking and I think we went a few weeks without really spending time together. And this just continued to get worse and worse and now it's finally at that breaking point. Because we weren't spending time together, we've just grown apart.
We've never been that serious the entire time we've been together. We've never said "I love you" and I've been okay with that. But, it's also gotten to that point where I really want to be a bigger part of his life. It was fine when we were just starting to date.. however, after being together a good 9 months now, I don't want to be continuously put on the back burner. I know this is something that isn't going to change and I'm not going to push the issue any more. He's so independent and I don't think he wants to be with someone seriously. But for some reason, he wanted to be with me.
I hate this part right here.
Comments (2)
I've been in a similar situation with several different relationships and the simple fact of the matter is:a relationship is about being with the person you care about,supporting each other and sharing your life together.When it starts to feel more like work than something easy and natural then it may just be time for you to go your separate ways.Sometimes it can be worked through with communication..but it has to be mutual.
No matter what happens,keep your chin up! And remember that you deserve to be treated like the most important thing in your man's life.
Don't ever settle for less
I'm in a situation almost exactly like yours.. except my ex is one of my coworkers, and I still see him almost every day (for about 5 seconds so its ok sometimes). I kinda sorta think he might have been cheating on me with his ex, but I don't know for sure. He hasn't said... he made excuses for not wanting to see me and ignored my phone calls. I think I fell hard for him too. It hasn't even been a month, and some days I think I'm over him and others I don't. Bue he was an asshole and I know I deserve better. If you wanna read more I have it on my blog.. not the entire thing but recently a lot of entries about him on my blog. Ugh, good luck, I know it takes time to get over him. I'm still getting over mine.